Posts Tagged ‘mean’

For months now I’ve been trying to take a picture of my coworker to post because I swear he could pass for Susan Boyle’s twin brother.  Well I finally did it! I’m so proud of myself.

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This is my coworker, and now for comparison here is a pic of Susan Boyle.

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You decide for yourself.

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Oh, shit!

Posted: 07/27/2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , ,

I was taking a bowl to the sink when my boss pushes past me and turns on the sink faucet.

Me : Yeah, of course you’re excused.

Bill : Well I said excuse me, but you couldn’t hear me because you’re listening to your faggy music.

By the way I’m super possessive of the music I listen to. I have phenomenal taste in music. If you don’t think so then you have bad taste.

Me: You’re the last person to call anything faggy. You’re so gay fucking Ru Paul is telling you yo calm your tits. Which is funny because you’re so far back in the closet I’m surprised you haven’t found Narnia.

Everyone was is shock.  No one knew if the should laugh or be afraid. But all my manager did was turn red and walk away. In hind sight I guess I shouldn’t have said that but too late now.

Me: what would you do if you had a time machine?

Sam: go back in time and create Google

Jack: create Viagra

Me: I would go back in time and buy stocks in Mac and Google then pay for Raymonds moms abortion

Jack and Sam: OMG… then laughter…

To be honest i really would do exactly that

Raymond: why are you so mean to me

Me: cuz you’re ugly. ( i didn’t feel like explaining myself for the millionth time)

Raymond: what are you talking about? I’m sexy.

Me: you look like Eddie Murfey if he had Down’s Syndrome.

Raymond: why does everybody say that?!?!?!

I wish i was making this up